Confessions Series

I’m afraid to write.

Yes, that’s right. I am afraid to write, and even though this is not my first official confession, I thought I should get it out of the way.

I love writing and at the same time, I’m dead scared of doing it. I don’t know why. Maybe it’s because I know what I like to read and won’t accept to write anything less than what I would expect to read somewhere else.

Maybe it’s because I don’t know the reaction people will have when they read whatever I write, or maybe it has to do with the many other confessions I’ll be making here in the blog. I don’t know.

A lot of people who don’t know me personally, who only know me through this blog, social networks or even by just seeing me in meetings or church, might have the mistaken idea that I have it all together, that my life is wonderful, that I barely make mistakes or that I am very wise (I don’t know if anyone really thinks that but just in case lol).

Well just like in the movies I write about, the reality couldn’t be further from the truth and that’s why I’ve decided to start these series here in my blog.

I find that it’s easier for me to learn something through a person’s experience. For example, if a friend talks about all her achievements in life and how her life is so different and better from what it was once, I will celebrate and be happy for her and that will end there. But if she tells me her struggles, how hard it was for her, the times she didn’t get it right, I assure you, she will have my undivided attention because that’s the reality of things. That’s what I relate to.

Isn’t that why most people love to watch movies based on true stories? People want something real, something more than just a beautiful, moving story. They want something they can use in their own lives.

I know I’m not perfect and though I truly wish that was the case, I know I don’t get things right a lot of the times. I’ve made many mistakes, I’ve decided wrong many times, I have stood still when I was supposed to get moving and I moved when I was supposed to have done nothing. I’ve had wonderful days and I’ve had evil, dark days. And by sharing my experiences with you, I hope that you may learn something, anything that you can use for your own life.   

It’s impossible to talk about the things I learned without talking about the people who taught them to me, so yes, I will be talking about some of my friends (they don’t know hehehe).

But going back to the beginning, I am afraid to write. To this day, I have written 4 plays, a book and numerous blog posts and I still get butterflies in my stomach every time I know I have to write. Do I feel bad? Shouldn’t I be over this fear already? Yes and yes, but that’s not what matters. What matters is that I write regardless of how I feel. I overcome my fear every time I sit in front of my computer and start typing.

That’s how you overcome fear. Even though 90% of you say you can’t, that you are just not capable, you do it anyway. You don’t wait to feel brave. You act brave and you will soon find out you don’t need to feel anything. You just need to believe.

So stay tuned for my first real Confession next Tuesday. I call that episode in my life: “The kiss of Revelation” O_o

So see you next Tuesday ;)

* In “Kiss of Revelation” I’ll be talking about a friend of mine who without knowing, played a huge part in the start of my change. And although I can’t say her name yet, I think some of you may know her. So here goes a clue… she is beautiful, has long black hair, has a blog of her own and was in one of my recent Instagram pictures. Can you guess who it is?

What a Strange Feeling…

I have to confess. The reason I’ve not been writing here on my blog is more than just not having/finding/making the time to… After staying so long without writing, I started thinking that I’ve kind of lost… my edge. I tried writing these last couple of months, but it just didn’t come out right. It didn’t sound at all like me.

But today someone inspired me to come back to it (thank you Yuli). But before I continue telling you about my journey ‘In the Last 5 Months (well, 7 now)’, I want to share an experience I had this year. Sorry in advance if the post is too long, please bear with me :)

You know, I’ve never been the mother type of woman; I’ve always been more of a big sister type of person. Never really dreamed of having kids, of holding my own baby in my arms (although I love holding other people’s babies hehehe) and having a little person calling me ‘mom’.

But something happened this summer…

I had the chance to work really closely with a group of youths from the YPG here in Houston. As I mentioned on my previous post, we were working on a Play I had written and now had to direct. We had to meet every week, once a week, sometimes more and so I had the chance to talk to them a lot, really get to know them. Their hurt, their disappointments, their dreams, their goals in life; and as I did, something deep inside me started to change… I started having a strange feeling, quite unknown to me.

In the beginning I thought it was just excitement to get the project completed, but after all these months I can say it was so much more than that.

Every time we met, I began to realize how much it mattered to me that they smiled, that they were happy. And if they didn’t smile, why didn’t they? Were they going through problems? How were they doing in school? Had they eaten? Did they have friends? A family who loved them? Did they know how talented they were? How beautiful? Did people tell them that? Did they know how important they were?

Why were these things so important to me all of a sudden? Why did it matter so much?

It mattered because while all the meetings and rehearsals were going on; while we struggled to get everything perfect; while we laughed and shared our experiences; while they made new friends and new memories, something inside of me changed, softened…

I started seeing people very differently since then. I guess I care more, much more in a more ‘personal’ way. It’s almost as if I became more aware of the people around me. I want to help them, add to their lives somehow, even if it’s just by complimenting them or recognizing how hard they work or by something as simple as just smiling at them.

Maybe this is something very simple to you, very familiar. Something you’ve done all your life. But maybe you are just like me 7 months ago, not selfish, but not so concerned about the small things, the details in a person’s life that matter so much to them. Maybe just like me, you were blind to all the little things that make the people around you, the people you love, who they are.

What about your little sister? Have you ever told her how good she is in certain things? Or asked your brother if he's eaten all day?

How about your mother? Have you ever told her how beautiful she is? Or your dad how much you appreciate all his hard work?

Have you stopped to think that maybe that person in your work place that always seem to be in a bad mood, is actually lonely and would just love to have someone to talk to, to listen to them?

Have you ever showed your friend how happy you are to have someone like her in your life? That she makes it better?

What I’m trying to say is, you don’t need to be a mother, or old enough, or experienced enough, have time enough or be ‘good’ enough to care about someone.

It’s in the little things that you start a change. It’s in the small things that you start making a difference.

It’s through these little details, the ones people usually don’t pay attention to, that you can really change someone’s life.

And you know what? By doing these ‘insignificant’ things that you start changing your life as well.

That group of people certainly did it for me. They changed something deep within me. They don’t know, but while they talked and worked and laughed and shared their lives and problems with me, I became what I never dreamed of:

I became a mom… well, sort of ;)

Photo Personality

My sisters would always tease me about this picture. They said I look awful hahahahahaha.


That may be, but this is undoubtedly one my favorite pictures of me as a child, because it clearly shows my personality :)


It's very important to have and keep our personality, but it's also important to change and better ourselves.


Changing doesn't mean losing yourself. It means creating a better version of you. We need to understand that we are not ok the way we are! There's always something we need to improve, change, let go of.


Some people want a new life, a better and different life but they refuse to make the slightest change about who they are. 


If you are not getting better, you are automatically getting worse, simply by doing nothing.


So, change your mindset. Look at your own faults, see what can be improved and go for it. You will see that as you progress as a person, as a human being, your life will progress as well.


You want a new life? Be a new person.

One of my major Flaws...

If you don't know me personally, you might have an idea about the way I am based on what you see in my blog:

* I like movies lol

* I like to talk to others about movies

* I like to read

* I smile a lot

* I think sincerity is a very important trait to have

* I'm part of the YPG

* I like to be in contact with my 'followers' here on the blog 

And other things you might have noticed.

However there's something about me that I have never talked about with you but that can also be noticed here on my blog.

This is one of the things I hate the most about me. Are you ready for this?

One of my major flaws is THE INABILITY TO DO MANY THINGS AT THE SAME TIME. In other words, to manage my time well.

I have read a few books on the subject, I have learned from people who truly know how to do this, and believe me, I HAVE TRIED many, many times. But then last week I realized that it's not that I don't know how to manage my time well so much as it is that I'm not disciplined enough. So, I have made a decision!

I'm going to be putting in practice everything that I've learned about time management, I will challenge myself to CHANGE once and for all and I'll be posting here (every Monday) about my progress and what I learn along the way.

So, since I know for a fact that I'm not the only human being with that problem, I'd like to challenge someone else.

I'm looking for a partner, someone who struggles a lot with time management and who undoubtedly suffers with the consequences of it. The reason I'm doing this is because it's easier to change something about ourselves when we have to be accountable to someone, plus the fact that the other person becomes an extra motivation.

If you are interested in joining me in this challenge, please send me a message here. I'll be sending you personal messages and tips and that way we will be able to monitor each other's progress. Please bear in mind that in order for you to be my partner in this, you need to be a follower of my blog lol. So please, go to the right-hand side of this blog where it says 'Friends' and click on 'Follow'.

My 'Time Challenge' starts today and continues until... I change :)

P.S.: Have you been trying to change something about yourself but is not able to? Go public! Tell someone, ask for help. When all else fails... go public.


P.S. 2: To register to become my partner, please follow this link: Registration Form.